Single, Suave Scientist Relied upon for Experiment Regarding Renewable BDE

By: Bobby Johnson, WTL

Updated: 8:45 PM CT, Tues February 8, 2022

In 2019, the United Nations assembled the Coalition of Honorable Operations to Discover Energy. This task force had one mission, to discover renewable energy for the world to use in order solve an abundance of crises facing the planet. Doctor Carlos Moreno joined the coalition in July of 2020 and gave CHODE a reinvigorated idea towards renewable energy. The lead doctors, being inspired by Moreno, discovered that they were able to harness what they called Biologically Domineering Exuberance, or BDE (colloquially called "big dick energy").

While performing their tests on numerous different energy producing avenues, they soon realized that their tests were being tainted by an abundance of BDE. These tests were the ones that heavily involved Dr. Moreno. "We'd never seen anything like it," recalled Dr. Woo, one of the leading scientists and witness to the massive BDE of Dr. Moreno. "He would walk into a room and you would just feel the BDE, regardless of who was talking or what experiments were being done."

"He would walk into a room and you would just feel the BDE"

CHODE immediately began their search for candidates to join their sample group of people with BDE. They recruited from across the globe and found many candidates with high levels of BDE who were mainly from Brazil, Italy, and New Jersey. However, when they brought the group together in the UN facilities, their BDE levels went down considerably. "It's like their levels couldn't compare to Dr. Moreno when they were in his presence," noted a Dr. Schiffer. "He would begin conducting the studies and his BDE overcame theirs by a factor of four at least." They recalled how they had to stop the study for some time to figure out just why they couldn't maintain the levels. If they couldn't maintain them, then how were they going to study them long enough to create a renewable source out of BDE?

"His BDE overcame theirs by a factor of four at least"

Eventually, for the sake of the planet, studies had to continue. They began running the experiments using only the BDE of Dr. Moreno, who had to step aside as a researcher to remain objective in the experiments. "It's unfortunate," said Woo. "He is the best researcher we have and a hell of a leader! If only we could find someone else with a higher level of BDE so he could use his BDE to run the test. One of life's cruel ironies I suppose."

Update: Hundreds of applications have been sent in by subjects claiming to have a higher BDE. None have lived up to the levels of Dr. Moreno. CHODE has asked that all the Chads and Kyles to please stop wasting their time.